I'm Just Like The Juggernaut:

Since all of my classes ended, with the exception of the time that I spent in Maryland, my activities have been limited to sitting around, staring at the computer, and watching television.  I haven't forgotten about my novel.  At this point in my life, my most crippling fear is that I will become just like Brian Griffin, working on the same novel for three years without any real progress.  Of course, I've told enough people about this project that there's always going to be a Stewie by my side reminding me that I'm throwing my life's work to the side of the road as his voice gets higher and higher, digging deeper and deeper.  I must combine this sad knowledge with the fact that I also desperately want to devote more effort to short fiction for the sake of a completely new project that I would really like to make happen.  And what have I done about it?  Nothing besides the completely useless endeavor I am going about right now, i.e. complaining about my own laziness, which sounds about as annoying as it is pathetic.  I'm being a little too hard on myself, thank God.  I only brought up my summertime laziness because slowly I am making steps to move beyond it.  Last week, I made the horrible and shameful decision to pick up my Nintendo DS again and begin playing a new game of Pokemon Pearl.  That entertained me until it pissed me off two days ago, when a Graveler KO'ed my stupid fire monkey with a single attack.  I tossed the hand-held life-sucker aside, and I haven't looked back since.  That was Step One, but I guess that doesn't really count, because it was preceded by a huge step backwards.

Step Two occurred yesterday when I went to Target with the intention of buying a gift for a friend at her graduation party.  Instead, I left with something for myself: a copy of David Sedaris's new book, entitled When You are Engulfed in Flames.  That's the good news, but here's the even better news.  I'm reading again, and it's not homework.  I had forgotten how fulfilling that feels.  The last book I read for recreation took me months to finish, because I had make time for it in between many assignments.  Now, I can spend the whole day reading what I want to if I want to.  Today I read about a hundred pages of Sedaris's latest work, having read seventy-five pages yesterday, and I might continue reading even more tonight.  I'm just like the Juggernaut.  Now that I have momentum, I can't be stopped.  (Alright, maybe Rogue could slow me down, or that bald kid from the third X-Men movie, but I prefer to forget that I ever saw that film.)  I've been a fan of Sedaris for a couple of years now, and this book definitely follows in the footsteps of his other essay collections.  In fact, I'd go as far to say that this book didn't take a single step without carefully placing a foot right into a genuine footfall left in the sand by Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim or Me Talk Pretty One Day, two books with precisely the same shoe size.  In reading all of his books, I've picked up on some significant trends in Sedaris's essay.  For instance, it seems like the real job of a professional essayist (or nonfiction writer or whatever one might prefer to be called) is to weave together a few seemingly unrelated topics or events in such a way that the reader is left with a moral, a chuckle, or anything to think about.

Did I ever tell you about my senior prom?  It reminds me of the time that I was in Albany for the state championship in speech and debate.  While I was there, I sat alone and reflected on the first time that I stood before an audience for a reading at a coffeehouse at my high school.  I was so nervous that suddenly I had a flashback to the time when I met my first girlfriend, which subsequently resulted in a flash-forward to when she would dump me about a year later, even though it was impossible that I could see that because at the time it hadn't happened yet, and at the moment she was in the audience, though she wasn't facing me because she never really paid attention that day.  Sorry, for a moment there I think I stopped parodying a David Sedaris essay and accidentally moved on to parodying an episode of Lost.  Perhaps that's the secret that the creators of Lost have been leading up to all this time.  Maybe Sawyer, Locke, and all the others are just characters in the imagination of David Sedaris.  That might explain their tragic existences, the non-sequential stories, and plot points that are so bizarre that at times they seem comical.  Of course, this theory is completely unfounded and based solely on hearsay, considering that I have never watched a single episode of Lost.  Nevertheless, if my sources on Lost are correct, then I am semi-confident that my idea will turn out to be better than any mixed-up, faux science mumbo-jumbo the creators can come up with, because from what I've heard that show has just become over-the-top silly ridiculous.  (Yes, I had to use all of those adjectives.)

Sure, I've been lazy for the past few weeks, but I think I deserve a break after what Regis High School has put me through over the past four years.  Biology, Algebra 2, Asian History, Church History, American History, Chemistry, Geometry, Trigonometry, Latin (for three years), European History, Physics, Precalculus, Calculus, Art History.  And I didn't even list the classes I liked.  So, yeah, I'm kicking back for a while.  After my graduation this weekend, I'll start taking life more seriously.  I'll make myself a system so I can guarantee some creativity, a daily word count or something to that effect.  I may even get my first real job this summer.  But for now, all the productivity I can handle is right here beside me: a laptop computer, a remote control, and a hardcover book with the image of a smoking skeleton on the cover.  Oh, and I'll need some podcasts to go with that, too.  In fact, I'll even interrupt my own finely crafted, "full circle" conclusion to bring you a couple of recommendations.  First, J.C. Hutchins has brought together many of the greatest authors in the new media scene to create a groundbreaking short story collection that he calls "7th Son: Obsidian," available at his web site.  Furthermore, talented author / podcaster Mur Lafferty has just launched her latest project, "The Takeover," her own audio drama complete with an all-star cast of podcasters lending their voices.  That reminds me that I want to tell you folks about Balticon 42.  Oh, and while I'm recalling past events, I ought to tell you about my prom as well.  And hey, I've never told you all about the New York Speech Championship, have I?  No time for all that now.  I guess it'll just have to wait.

End Post.

Comments

[Mur]

Thanks for the link, Will! Glad you're liking The Takeover. And your stream of consciousness with Lost hurts my head. In a good way. :)

[Uncle B]

The reviews that I've read of the DS book suggest that it is somewhat different than his previous work. In fact, I think I saw something where he said that he thought it was time to stop whining -- and so the book is "nicer."
Uncle B